Alien Languages
by Happy for Deep People
Summary: The TARDIS lands in an unknown location, taking the Doctor into a long forgotten nightmare...


**Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who (that's, what my analyst told me to write) :P**

The TARDIS landed, with the usual ethereal and somehow elegant wheeze, and Rose Tyler's heart thumped in anticipation. It didn't matter where she landed, the TARDIS always brought them to a fascinating new adventure, where wonder and danger were always just around the corner.

The Doctor has set the coordinates to random, taking them to... who knew where? Rose had begun to think the Doctor – all 900 years of him – just liked to be surprised every now and then. But it wouldn't kill him to admit that!

"I've set the coordinates to random", the Doctor said putting on an air of mystery, "I have no idea where we are! It's - "

"-More fun that way!" Rose finished for him, "You're becoming a cliché Doctor! Rose Tyler, humble human can finish the Great Oncoming Storm's Sentences for him!"

The Doctor refused to rise to Rose's jeers. "Rose", he said to her, staring into her eyes with the look of intensity that, normally, Rose found so attractive – and that she knew he used to dazzle her, "We could be anywhere, any_when _in the entire-"

"- Known Universe!" Rose jeered. This was fun! "Seriously Doctor, get some new lines, willya?"

The Doctor put on a wounded air. "If you'd rather go somewhere else..." He had on his biggest, widest puppy-dog eyes, and was going into full guilt trip mode. Instantly Rose felt awful for taunting him.

" No, Doctor I was only teasing! I'd love to see... erm, wherever with you."

"Really?" He was literally pouting!

"_Really._"

"Right then!" The Doctor offered Rose his arm and the pair skipped towards the TARDIS doors.

"Allonsy!" the Doctor cried, then paused at the doors in surprise. Rose had said the word at the exact same time – in what he'd surely recognized as an attempt at the voice of his highly distinguished 10th regeneration!

"Stop that!" the pair cried in unison, "Stop copying me! _Rose_!"

"See Doctor?" Rose laughed, "Predictable!"

"Well you may think so, Rose," the Doctor said in his snootiest tone, "But I think you'll find that parroting me will become nigh impossible! After all, I am-"

"- The last citizen of Gallifrey!" cried Rose, triumphant. "You can't beat me!"

"Oh you think so, do y- _PeanutButterJellyDirt!!_" the Doctor broke off, groaning in frustration when Rose matched him word for word.

Rose stuck her tongue out and the Doctor made a grotesque face with wagging tongue and crossed eyes. This seemed to be stalemate in his eyes, and the made ready to open the doors.

"Ready?" he asked, his warm brown eyes, alight with excitement. Wordlessly, Rose linked an arm through his, giving him her widest grin. She never tired of the feeling of stepping out the TARDIS to a new world – whether past Earth, future Earth, or some totally foreign planet, they were always beautiful, exquisite...

Rose stepped through the doors and her face fell...

_Grey. _

Yes that was definitely the best way to describe where they'd landed. Grey concrete lapped around grey blocks of flats, which towered into the whitish-grey cloudy sky. The only colour was the garish graffiti on the brick walls, and the occasional piece of litter carried on the wind. It reminded Rose, depressingly of her estate, and for an awful moment she imagined the Doctor had got sick of her and brought her home.

Then she realised that was ridiculous, however similar, this was definitely the Powell Estate. So where we they?

"Excuse me!" the Doctor called, bounding towards a passerby – an old, hunched over man, carrying a plastic carrier bag which held, by the look of it a large bottle of cider, a carton of cigarettes and a packet of hobnobs. "This may seem like a funny question, but can you tell us where we are?"

The man eyed Rose appreciatively – the sort of pervy stare old guys thought they could get away with 'cause of their age, starting at her feet and slowly wandering up to her face. Gross. He twitched his whiskery, ginger eyebrows at her, then turned to the Doctor with a look of disgust.

"_Areyouferrealsonn_?"

"Pardon me, sir?"

"_Ahsaidareyouferrealweeman_?"

Rose decided to try, "Do you understand _English_?"

"Achfeckinenglishgonnaeletusgethametaemaboozehen?" and with that the old guy gobbed a gooey wad of saliva on the pavement, and walked away.

"Doctor what was that? I thought the TARDIS translated every language?"

"That was English Rose," the Doctor said grimly.

"Are you having a laugh?"

"No Rose I'm deadly serious." He looked grave, his forehead creased into a frown. "I've seen this before."

That was his dangerous alien voice. This, at least Rose understood.

"So what is it then? Strange new alien threat abusing people's voices?"

"Worse."

"Oh, Doctor, we've not fallen into another parallel universe have we?"

"No, worse than that."

"It's the Daleks, ain't it? Gotta be! They're the mastermind behind every weird Earth conspiracy these days..." Rose's voice trailed away.

"Oh Rose, I'm so sorry."

"Doctor what is it, you're scaring me!"

Rose saw, properly, for the first time since the pervy old man had spoken, how afraid the Doctor looked.

"I'm so sorry I brought you here, Rose, really. But you have to know"

"_What, Doctor?!" _

The Doctor looked at her intensely, and a shiver ran down Rose's spine, imagining the horror he was about to share.

"We're in _Glasgow_."

**Dun dun duuuuuuuuun!**

**Bet you never saw that coming!! :D**

**But, to anyone from Glasgow, I actually live there myself, so any insult is purely affectionate!!**

"**I like coffee, I like tea"... I also like reviews ******


End file.
